Dragon & Phoenix – Love Relations in Daoism

In Chinese culture, dragons symbolize the male and the phoenix symbolizes the female. It is a common understanding that the female is flexible and the male is rigid, the male is strong, and the female is soft. In Daoism, we try to keep in balance with our training to prevent things from becoming uneven. By outweighing the weaknesses of each extreme, one can achieve harmony within.

Ignoring the facts of natural attraction will greatly change oneself and the environment; if one is focused on self-cultivation, it is also natural to attract other people who might be compatible with each other.

Polarization – to Attract the opposite

The most important part of Daoism’s life philosophy is self-cultivation; taking care of oneself is an important part of showing your efforts and honesty. Through self-cultivation, one can attract the outweighing opposite. A male usually takes over the responsibility like a rock in the surf, while the female represents the rebirth of hope and happiness. Together, a couple can achieve the so-called harmonic balance.

The nature of the male is to be strong in the initiative, even though the action might not be initially ideal. The male usually has the resources for building a future. The nature of the female tends to be in a supportive role and often is very good at providing council; also, the male can do the simple task easier that requires a higher amount of resources; the female is usually good at managing and optimizing it.

I think you get the point how both genders have natural roles in bringing out the best of their true potentials and balancing it so that both can perform at their fullest strength. In Daoism, the whole idea is that both can achieve more than one. To attract your balancing another half, a man has to find himself to polarize for the female to know what is needed; this goes both ways for each gender, of course.

Build Supportive – Harmonically Together

It is important to understand what attracts each other in a relationship, find the common source, and understand your partner’s motivation. When there is a common goal – a future that both can identify with – only then it is possible to support each other.

In a relationship, taking into account the personal interest of your partner is very important to understand each other’s needs. Like Yin and Yang, the perspective from the other is always a reflection of the opposite’s needs – realizing this by thinking about the other – naturally, the relationship balances each other’s needs out.

Solving Conflicts – Overcoming Mountains

There has to be a little resistance and a little conflict for a healthy couple to understand each other’s tolerance and the will to support each other. Suppose a couple can overcome mountains; it is less likely to stop in front of a mountain. On the peaks, the tea grows small, but the taste is rich, and the trees usually become older due to its internal strength from the environment and the lack of pests. Putting yourself in a spot where one usually does not want to be but is willing to achieve great things will help in overcoming conflicts in many ways.

If there arises a conflict, it mostly would be because the other half cannot trust the common spirit within the relationship. Letting go of personal interest, the own ego, and working towards what is needed together, for your partner, and reaching what both wish for, will help to achieve common trust.

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